February 19, 2010

I’m told that I suffer from depression. How can this be! It is unconstitutional.  No Australian should suffer from depression, I mean, “She’s right mate,” is our protection isn’t it? And what about, “No worries,” being depressed makes us Aussies look like wooses.

Depression is a debilitating disease, often leading the depressed individual to procrastinate over jobs that need to be done. Great, just great, so now I can expect to be a procrastinator. No, wait, I already procrastinate and I must admit, it gets me down.

I’m told that if I have a pill called an antidepressant, then I’ll increase my chances of overcoming depression. Now I have to take a pill? Where is it written in our constitution that to overcome a disorder, we have to take a pill, we’ll become a nation of drug addicts if the word gets out. Imagine, “Feeling depressed?” “Yes.” “Here, take this pill and join the rest of society.”

I always thought that having a BBQ was our way of attaining happiness and alleviating depression. A couple of beers and Bobs your uncle. No depression. Take a pill? What if the pill makes me sick? I’ve heard that an MAOI or monoamine oxidaze inhibiter for us pill takers, can cause my blood pressure to increase, and I have to watch what I eat and drink. Again, it’s unconstitutional, Australian should be denied a lamb chop of a big piece of steak. Nor should we be told not to drink beer, but hey, if you have to use a MAOI, then you have to do what you’re told.

Ah well. The dilemma will add to my depression, unless; I follow the instructions. You little beauty.

February 10, 2010

Depression is not a dirty word. Many men don’t like talking about their health, little lone depression. I will admit that I suffer from depression and believe me, it is not pleasant. Depressed people are less active mentally and physically than non depressed people. The odd thing about depression is that more often than not, we don’t need to continue suffering. If an individual changes the way they think about what it is that is making them depressed, they can reduce the level of depression experience. The funny thing about depression is the fact that it generally leads to negative thinking, the feeling that ‘I can’t be bothered’, and consequently, not changing our thinking since we believe that what we are experiencing is meant to be. Ah, the folly in thinking. The truth is, we can change our thinking and therefore our beliefs at any time if we really want to. So, don’t suffer depression. Believe in yourself and believe that what your brain is telling you that you can’t do, you really can do. Give it a go, you are worth it.

God I need a foot up the bum. I have neglected writing Bloggs because I became lazy. Sorry people. I promise to keep up. My first blogg is of course, this one but my second blogg follows immediately. Stay tuned.

June 6, 2009

“A being than which none greater can be thought,” what a great definition for God! Anselm derived some great thinking when he defined God, thus. It has become the mantle for Procrastinators since, because tomorrow never comes, there can be no greater reason for procrastinating.

Think about it! If on this day I decide to complete a task tomorrow, and when on the next day I think about it, tomorrow hasn’t come. So, like God, I can put off completing the task adinfinitum.

Can you think of a greater being than which none can be thought? Isn’t it great? If you can think of a greater being then, that being must be God, since, there cannot possibly be a greater being, unless you don’t believe in God in the first place then there is nothing to  argue.

But, truly, tomorrow will never come since on the day after the said day that the statement was uttered, if I ask, “Is it tomorrow yet?” You can say, “No. Wait twenty four hours.” It’s fantastic! You can wait twenty four hours and tomorrow is still in the future. See? You never have to worry about completing a task provided you say to the task giver, “I will have it completed tomorrow.”

Don’t be trapped into saying you’ll have it completed by 12June, since this will bind you. Imagine how foolish you would feel if you didn’t complete the task! You would not be true to your word.

Ah, thank God for the Society for Lovers of Procrastination (SLOP), our motto, wait until tomorrow stands firm in our hearts. Join us and become a lazy, slothful person who always has a sound excuse for tardiness. “No worries, it’ll be done tomorrow. You can stake your life on it.”

May 30, 2009

You’ve heard of evangelists, now read about a new society, a society where everyone procrastinates. In fact, why not join our society and be in good company. We meet once a month when we can decide on a date, and you’ll join great company if the other members can be bothered coming to a meeting.

There’s a benefit behind belonging to SLOP; for a start, you will never need to feel guilty about not completing any tasks because we will teach you the tricks of the trade where you can rationalize quite convincingly, that you meant to do it, but were far too busy. Of course there are other ways that you can explain away your procrastination, but you’ll have to attend a meeting to get those; when we plan it.

The founding two members meet regularly since we have desks next to each other. We support one another all the time by explaining to the other how hard working they are, until he feels good about not finishing the task. Phil, he’s the other guy who started SLOP with me, plans on making a logo for our group when he can be bothered; I look forward to seeing it someday.

We have a whole range of mottos, one being ‘look forward to tomorrow.’ Isn’t it great? I always set tasks for tomorrow since I know that tomorrow never comes. See how simple it is to make excuses? “Hey Ian, can you get ……….. finished for me?” “Yeh, no worries, I’ll finish it tomorrow.” Makes sense doesn’t it?

Guess what! We even have a theme song. Remember Peggy Lee? She sang ‘Manyana’ a song about putting it off until tomorrow. “And then I say Manyana and it’s good enough for me.”

In deed, we are in good hands. I have worked out that God has been misquoted. Why is the earth’s population increasing so rapidly? It was reported that God said, “Go forth and procreate.” That was an error. God said, “Go forth and procrastinate,” but since there wasn’t much to procrastinate about way back then, He was quoted incorrectly. So let’s correct God’s message of wisdom. Join us.

If you don’t think you will ever be as good as Phil and me, hey, we have a principle which will ease you in. It is called the ‘Conditional Manyana Principle.’ You can always say, “I am waiting for more information before I can complete this task.” It might be true, but we’ll recognize it as an excuse. No problem!

There is one thing that’s certain. Many of our students (yes, we are teachers) would feel right at home within our group. They learnt the principles all by themselves. Phil and I are quite proud of them. I mean, for me, I have less work to mark and the students have an excuse for failing. How can anyone say they have failed if the work wasn’t done. Think about it. How good can you feel if a fail grade is given when the work wasn’t done in the first place?

Even the perfectionist student can join SLOP. Oh yes they can! Why complete the work if it isn’t going to be as good as I would want? ‘Hey, if I complete the work, and it is good, then won’t , they the teachers, expect good work next time?’ See! It is that simple. Excuses can be generated from anything, so get off your butt and join us.

You may not be old enough to remember, but back in the late seventies, their used to be a round badge with the word ‘tuit’ printed on it. You know, it was for those who finally got around to it. Ha ha, but Phil and I plan to redesign the badge. No longer do we have to be humiliated by the sentiment behind that hideous badge. We plan on putting a big red cross through it. Yep, we will never get ‘a round tuit’, not because we are lazy, but simply because tomorrow never comes. It is difficult for us though when we set home work. I can’t set the due date for tomorrow, so, I violate one of our basic principles by giving an actual due date. Ah well, we can’t always be perfect at what we do best. But the students, they still stand beholden to the manyana principle

I expect my email box to be over flowing with requests to join SOP. Maybe not today, may be not in the next week, or month, because good procrastinationalists would take the time to think about what they are committing to. There’s no need to rush is there?

Many a good business venture has been lost because of prolonged thinking, but we would rather think that it wouldn’t have worked. So, dream on and have great success in your mind, let’s face it, you wouldn’t have succeeded anyway.

Good luck to you all. Look for our web page-when we get the time to complete it.

Phil and Ian

May 11, 2009

Cancer is serious. Like the flue or a cold, you can’t just take a pill to get cured. It cannot be ignored. Unfortunately, unlike the flue or a cold which are expressed very soon after contracting the disease, cancer can lay latent, hidden until the right moment to be expressed. But, cancer can provide us with warning signs which are often ignored, particularly amongst men.

Yes, I’m talking about cancer of the prostate. Symptoms include slow urine flow, slow to start, burning sensations, even a pain in the back. Just a sniff of cancer regarding the prostate and many men go into an apoplectic fit. “No ones going to stick a finger up my arse,” they laugh. But if they have the cancer, they don’t laugh for long. A lousy thing to say, but unfortunately true.

You know, there is no loss of dignity about the digital-rectal inspection. It is still rated as a major test for cancer of the prostate. No, it cannot diagnose the disease 100%, but it certainly suggests that the disease may exist within the prostate and is a prompt for more accurate tests, such as a biopsy.

Choose life, not false pride or manhood. I’m sure your family will be please if you do. Life goes on after the procedure. I have lived seven years beyond the operation which eliminated my cancer, and I expect to live a lot longer yet.

Be positive. Take the test and get satisfaction of knowing.

May 9, 2009

It is seven years since I had my prostate removed because of cancer of the prostate. Seven years is a long time when confronting cancer, and I believe that I will endure many more years yet.

Since my initial operation, I have had radiation treatment and Hormone therepy, now, I am at the will of the Gods, so to speak. I am free lancing, living from day to day without a thought for cancer. I bring it up now, because I need to demonstrate that you can fight prostate cancer.

Yes, there may be side effects which many men might find daunting, but I am alive and loving it. I have a new grand daughter, Mika making a grand total (no pun intended) of grand children of seven. Seven years since the operation and seven grand kids. A lucky number.

If I had not undergone a radical prostatectomy, I might not be here now to tell you about it, and I would have missed out on seeing my grand children growing up. Which is more important? Keeping my self image as a man alive or living to tell the story while keeping a watchful eye on my grand kids? I know what I would rather do, and I did it.

Since my operation, I know four other men who have since gone under the knife and had their prostate removed. All of them are grad that they did and are living healthy lives. I believe that we owe it to our families to live and enjoy life with them, rather than put them through the trauma of death. Why am I saying this? Because too many men refuse to have a check up and too many men refuse to do anything about it when they find out that they have cancer of the prostate. What a shame. Death is forever, life is short so why not make the most of life and have a check-up or, have the vital operation which will save your life. What have you got to lose!

Be a man, face your problems head on and live to tell the story.

Help support Kids with cancer. Look through my web pages and find my eBook on cancer of the prostate. 80% of royalties go the kids with cancer. I will add your story if you choose; send me an email telling me about your experience.

May 3, 2009

What a strange land of video this is. All sorts of silly stuff get on you tube so I thought I’d join them. Of course I had to use it to make a video to advertise my book so if any of you want to see a clip of me making a fool of my self, go to you tube and search for ‘Stay: The search begins.’

There was a clip of a guy pulling a funny face and it had 220, 000 hits. I can’t believe it! If I get ten hits I’d be happy. If I got more, I’d be ecstatic. If I got more than 100, you’d have to read my funeral information.

 

Ah well, that’s the way it goes. My fame might come from making an ass of myself on this media.

April 15, 2009

On TV recently (April, 2009), Robert Gordon a Trauma Psychologist, said about the fire victims that those who hold on to blaming others and do not move on have more trouble overcoming their grief than those who move on (or words to that affect).

This got me to thinking about life in general. I know that I have blamed others for certain things that have happened in my life and regarding those facts, I didn’t move on, or gain the success that I had desired as a consequence to attributing the blame to someone else. Blame is easy. ‘It wasn’t my fault, so and so didn’t…’ When you blame someone else, you are off the hook. I mean, because the blame has been attributed to someone else or something else, ‘I’ or you can feel good about yourself because, after all, ‘It wasn’t my fault.’

You know what though! Success is limited. In fact, success can be very elusive since ‘It wasn’t my fault that I didn’t make it. Nobody told me.’  When you play the blame game, you become a master of excuse making. And, it’s never your fault. it is always someone else who contributes to your lack of success.

Ah! The art of blaming is alive and well. I suppose, over a long period of time I might become depressed, or procrastinate more, but? I mean, ‘It’s not my fault that I feel this way. I can’t help putting things off because others don’t…’  You fill in the rest.

Do you know where blame is alive and well? In the classroom. ‘My teachers are stupid,’  ‘my math teacher can’t teach,’  ‘The teachers don’t listen to me,’  ‘I wasn’t told to hand my work in,’ and so it goes on. With many students, they are never at fault. Failure is defined as being caused by the teachers, ‘why else would a good kid like me fail?’  Again, blaming the teacher, or others in the class is easy, so, failing comes easily.

Isn’t it time to get serious about the blame game? Stop playing! You’ll get know where while you see others as being the cause for your inabilities.

April 12, 2009

In the last blog, I began with the idea of keeping the writing going. “Don’t procrastinate,” I said. Huh! look who’s talking. I have procrastinated for two months now on getting this, my next blog up and going. But I still believe that if you want to get published, you have to keep writing. At least with regards to my book, I am keeping up to date and writing regularly. Well, that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it.

Now that you are writing, keep an accurate record of events, character names, place names and so on. If you don’t, you will be forced to scroll through the pages in search of a name or spelling. Let this record be in writing and on paper. This way, you will always have essential information at hand. And while your busy writing, stay true to the character. Don’t change their behaviour or the way they think- unless you have a plan.

If you use abbreviations, use the same abbreviation style throughout the book. For instance, doctor can be written as: doctor, Dr, dr or Doctor. If you create an abbreviation for your novel, stick to this rule. You might understand the reason for a change in abbreviation, but your readers will get confused.

While we’re on a bit of a spelling thing here, don’t rely solely on the word processor spell check, or grammar check for that matter. Your word processor can be set using a wide variety of ‘English’ styles. There is British-English, Australian_English, US-English and so on. If you are planning to publish in US, set the spell checker to US-English, but check the spelling with a dictionary, and do not rely on the word processors grammar check. It can be wrong very often. Go back to your old English text books, or go on line to check your grammar.

Remember, you are in charge of your book, but poor grammar and spelling errors will not help to get you published. Keep the ideas flowing and stay mentally fit. Your book idea is worth the effort. Keep it up. Write to me if you get confused or if you need a push. Go for it.

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